Peace Within

Cold, afraid and tired she wandered down the streets in search of somewhere to hide for the night. Stumbling on the broken cobblestones of the New York City streets she hurried out of the road. Splashed by the passing taxi she moved closer to the line of buildings along the road. Hurrying away from a large group of people watching her as she passed them, she darted into a storefront entryway. Leaning her head back on the door she savered the warmth coming through the door. She stole a quick glance back in the direction she came. Good noone following me. Afraid of not only the people roaming the streets, she now had grown afraid of the police. Here to protect and serve, yeah right. Dashing back on to the sidewalk she hurried further down the street. In hopes of finding a small area to be hidden for the night, she looked in and out of the shop and apartment entries. Nothing. Afraid she would wander for the night, reaching in her pocket and counting her few dollars again. Only eighteen left. She could spare five for a safe night, couldn't she?

Just then a man grabbed her arm and shoved her against the window of the store she was passing. The window brightly displayed various women's clothing and lingere with bright red and gold Christmas advertisements. She screamed out in pain and he firmly grasped her shoulder with his large hand. "Hello, honey. How much money do you have?" "I...I don't have anything," she barely stammered out. "You little liar and cheat. Give me what you have," he roared back. Fear rushed through her as she stared up at the man pinning her back against the wall.

Not again, she thought. I can't loose what little money I have. She sqeezed her eyes shut as the memories flooded her mind. Memories of beatings, leaving her bleeing and bruised. Times where every penny was stolen from her. And worst of all, rape. The pain she felt. Emptiness that left her cold on the inside and afraid of everyone around her. Physically hurting for weeks. She had no one to help her, to cause her to understand. To help her heal. To wrap their arms around her. Someone to tell her everything would be ok. Someone to help her continue on.

"C'mon Frank, can't you see the girl doesn't have much if she even has anything. Let's go down to the bar. Find a pretty girl down that way." A man pulled Frank off of her. Shoving her back into the wall one last time Frank yelled in her year, "It's your lucky night little girl. Thank God Johnny's buying me a drink!"

She rushed away quickly as soon as he let go. She hurried accross the street. I have to get away from him, far away. Thoughts flooded her mind, fear tracing it's way through every part of her body. Afraid to look back and find Frank rushing to catch her, she ran with all the strength she had left. Don't look back, keep going. She pleaded with her body to cooperate with her mind.

Turning the corner she saw a building lying ahead. Such intricate design. The large windows cascaded light onto the streets in blues, greens, reds and violets. The composition of the building dated back centuries and caused it to stand out in the dingy streets. Looking up at it she felt drawn to it. Three stories high, it seemed to dominate the street. The arrangement of the building with large stained glass windows, great pillars lined the front and created a sense of domination. Her gazed followed up to the steeple that rose out of the roof top. A great design had been carved into the cross. Flowers and words were scribed in it. With the rain falling she couldn't make out the words written on it.

Please be open, please be open. She begged as she ran up the stairs to the front door. It opened quickly as she pushed on the latch bar. Holding the door so it would close quietly, she slipped her shoes off so they wouldn't squeak on the stone floor. Slipping inside the sanctuary quietly her breath left her. The beauty inside far surpassed the beauty of the outside. Peace flooded her as she slipped into a pew towards the back of the large room.

Looking around she noticed she was alone in this room, but heard faint music coming from back behind the stage and pulpit. She took her jacket off and she shook it out. Lying it on the ground underneath the pew in front of her, she hoped it would dry quickly. Bundling her sweater up into a pillow she lay down. Ducking underneath the pew as not to be noticed she curled up into a ball. Sighing deeply she hoped sleep would come quickly. And without the nightmares she had faced since the night she had been raped.

Sleep overtook her quickly. She never even notice she hadn't felt afraid for the first time since she had spent that first night sleeping on the streets. Peace filled her heart. It was a warm feeling on the inside of her.