Your Love

Your love is the flowers in the spring, colorful leaves in the fall, Christmas snowflakes on my eyelashes and summer most of all!.

Your love is the shiny Christmas presents, my birthday bash, Easter baskets hidden, Forth of July fireworks that end with a blast.

Your love is the laughter that fills my heart, the tears that stream down my face, the joy I hope will never be erased.

Your love is diamonds shinning in the sun, sweet kisses all day, your arms holding me close. I pray your love is here to stay.

When Life Hands You Lemons, Make Fajitas

So they say, when life hands you lemons, make lemonade. But, I think I would take the lemons, make fajitas and use the lemon juice on my fajitas, chips and toss the rest in my water. That's the best! Yeah, lemonade is grand (especially Ms. Valindas!!) but fajitas would fill me more, and quite practically are my favorite food. And well, lemonade is only the best in summer right?

I guess when life is difficult you can either stick through it, or you can get up and do something about it. Life's been difficult for me these last few weeks or so dealing with family deaths, injuries and hardships. And well I am doing something about it. I have learned to take my lesson from a situation and walk away better off because of it. My Grama taught me to never regret anything that happens or I will regret my life away.

The last year I lived in Texas was hard, extremely hard, but I walked away a better and stronger woman because of it. People don't always treat you right and life's not fair. But fair wouldn't be fun, would it? Sometimes you want to be the person who ends out on top and sometimes you just cant.

I guess what I am saying is that I am glad for who I am becoming because of the hardships I have dealt with. Some hard things mold you into a better person and some can cause you to be bitter. I choose not to be bitter and I choose to be the bigger person and love through it all. I am strong because of the arrows that were shot at me. I used my shield to reflect them and taught the others that I wont surrender. I sought the right path and headed in the right direction. Just because someone else does something wrong, doesn't mean you have to retaliate. Oh believe me, how I wanted to strangle some people at times. HA! But yeah, I let 'em live. They will have their own time, besides they answer to God, which is a whole lot scarier than I will ever be!

So when you are going through hard things and want the world around you to fade away its OK. Keep going through the darkness and a light will shine somewhere. But until it does, pull out your cell phone, blackberry or what have you and use it to show your footsteps ahead. I haven't made any lemonade lately, but I sure have eaten some good fajitas. Well right now I am full. I am taking my hardships and learning through them all. If you have any other questions, I think life can teach you along your path. Just keep going in the right direction.

Falling In Love With You

Everyday I feel myself move closer to the edge. I am afraid I will fall in love with you. How can I let this happen? I told myself I wouldn't. What if I do fall, will you catch me?
When you talk my heart leaps. When I wake up, I wonder if you will call. When we've spent the day together, I go to sleep happy.
How can this be? I didn't think my heart would feel so soon. I try to hold the feelings back but they only return stronger. When will I know if this is real? I am afraid to fall. I don't know if I am ready for this. Am I ready and just holding myself back? Do you understand me more than I realize?
I smile when I think of you. I laugh at what you say, even when you are gone. Just the sight of you makes me catch my breath. When you hold me I am safe. The touch of your hand causes my heart to beat.
Am I ready for love? Can you possibly want me as much as I want you? When will you tell me how you feel? Will I be ready to hear those words? What will my heart feel back?
You make me laugh. You make me smile. You make me happy. You teach me. You understand who I am. You challenge me. You care about me.
Have you become a part of me.....

Write For My Last Breath

So I've always said I could write 1000 words before I could ever say anything. One of my friends used to pressure me to open up and share what was inside of me, constantly. I guess that was part of the reason our friendship is not what it used to be. Granted there were several other circumstances and situations that changed our friendship. I am very candid when it comes to life, purpose and God. But I am a closed person on the inside. I have very vivid memories of my parents asking me questions; why I had done something, what I was thinking or feeling when tragic events occured or even what I wanted in life. I literally could not say anything...my only response was "I don't know." Because truthfully, sometimes I don't know. I don't know what I think until I begin to write it out...I don't know how I feel until I make time to get away and begin to feel it. I don't know until allow myself to break. Tragic events I suppose cause me to hurt, be afraid and such; but I pull to myself. I typically don't run to another person to gain strength, I look for the strength God has given me and put on the inside where I've tucked it away. I KNOW there are moments when I do need a person's ear, someone to hold me or even to look someone in the eye and tell how I truly feel. I write to say the little things I cannot find the words to express or the life I feel inside of me. I write to share what a heart feels when it is most alone in the crowd of a thousand people.